I did a series of quick watercolours to map my feelings about King Krule, feeling sad and not knowing why and feeling really passive about life. I think I am starting to obsess about things again, mostly (ok entirely) about King Krule. Except when I get obsessed with something its not picturesque and teen feelz like I see on tumblr, I don't make shrines or have pretty glitter and candles. Instead I listen to nothing but his music, consider getting fake id to sneak into one of his shows and then come close to tears when I realize I'm not even going to be in the country when he comes down to play Laneways/do sideshows. I build these really life consuming mental shrines and it makes me sad to think I might never meet him, just to talk to him and see if he's anything like I imagine him to be. Urghhhh whyyyyyyyy anyways here are the paintings I did:
Ps. BEYONCE JUST RELEASED A NEW ALBUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dear Shakespeare,
Sometimes I wonder why I write letters to you, gosh I probably sound like Kat's crazy friend in 10 things I hate about you. Oh well, I think its interesting to write to you, because your this amazing writer who will always be known and remembered, and I'm a nobody just trying to quietly make my way through life, its a pretty stark contrast. Whatevvsss. It's the holidays now, so I am actually doing things which do not involve wasting away online. I can't really be bothered writing, mostly because I have a lot to write about but haven't yet gotten it all down, urghh anyways I'll just show you some pictures of random stuff I've been doing recently...
I went traipsing through the city the other day with a friend and bought some pretty fab things:
Its a really wonderblime french photography magazine
A french play, in french, which I bought in Fitzroy
I had a major internal struggle as to whether I should get these
My letter from moon magic zine came :)
Ps. I'm a contributor for Moon magic zine now, eep and yay
Ps. I love King Krule, urghh he's coming to play some shows in January and its all 18+, I fucking hate being underage
Dear Shakespeare,
I have exams for school in a few days. Big scary exams which go on report cards and cause me such stress. Except I'm not actually stressing, I'm worryingly apathetic. I hope it changes soon because caring about nothing much doesn't really feel nice. I want to feel obsessed, I want to build shrines to ideas and people and things, but I can't because it feels all wrong, it feels flawed and blind.
Tavi's awesome shrine
I've been seeing a lot of 90's reminiscing online recently, sometimes it can feel like the 90's was the coolest time to have been alive, and yes I was around for the last two or so years but I don't really remember any of it. I can only really appreciate the decade now that I'm older through watching movies like clueless and 10 things I hate about you and listening to bands like Nirvana. But I do remember the 2000's, they were a weird time, it was like the 90's younger sister, the fashion was similar, the toys and games were similar and t.v shows were similar but the 2000's had something that the 90's can never ever ever claim... LIZZIE MCGUIRE.
Yeah that's right Lizzie is from 2001 (sassily snaps fingers in a 'z' formation) Lizzie was probably one of my best friends as a kid, actually she was the older sister I always wanted. Actually dang it I wanted to be Lizzie. Yes she may not have been as cool as Kate but Lizzie was a real teen and all I wanted when I was a kid was to be a part of the teenzz club. I figure the show gave me a really skewed perception of what adolescence would be like in a way that only Disney channel shows can. I am now a teen and I do not have a Gordo and Miranda, where is my Ethan? Why are my clothes not as cool as Lizzie's? Most importantly where is my snarky little cartoon alter ego? Obviously I have failed at being a teenager. No, but seriously Lizzie McGuire understands me far more than my peers and this is obviously due to the spiritual bond we share from the countless years of me watching episode after episode of her navigating through all her teenage troubles. Also Lizzie's fashion is ace, I could go on and on about the awesomeness of her clothes but let's just look at some pictures and feel all nostalgic:
Lizzie feelz me
aren't they the coolest gal pals?
Truly Mary,
Ps. We were totes listening to this in 2000 cos Destiny's child is the coolest
So I suppose I could begin this letter by whining about the urghness of school or apologizing for my lengthy letter writing absence (does that even make sense) but I have something so much cooler to talk about... my interview with the fabaroonie artist Saffa Khan. Which is why I included iced tea in the title, because where I live a good discussion is usually marked by some sort of yummy food and drink and even though I can't talk to her over some afternoon tea I can pretend to do so in a virtual sense (am I just rambling?). Anyways I remember first seeing Saffa's illustrations on the The Le Sigh and marveling at their wonderblime-ness, so being able to ask her some questions about her art and stuffz has been really awesome and I'm sure her interestinganswers make up for my sadly generic questions (all pictures are her art):
If you could be anyone ever, either fictional or real who would you be?
1) Hmm, that's a rather hard question, because there are so many different people (real life & fictional) that i admire so much! But, If I could be one person, I would most certainly be Morticia Addams. Unconditional loving husband, mature, but slightly violent children & overall a dysfunctional, but ridiculously loving family, what more could I ask for? Do you collect things? 2) Oh I'm a hoarder, I collect an awful lot of things, from train tickets, buttons and miniature books, to lost items in playgrounds, photographs and dead insects (mostly butterflies and moths). I also collect records and books. If you had to eat one food for/listen to one song/watch one film for an entire week what would it be? 3) I could easily eat just noodles for a long period of time, as sad at as it sounds, noodles make me very happy. That one song would be You by Keaton Henson. Hmm, one film? I like so many films, & I simply cannot pick just one, which is why I'm going to have to cheat (sorry) and pick two: The Secret Garden (1993) & Amélie.
Fast six: summer or winter? Strawberry milk or chocolate milk? Jellies or doc martens? Chocolate or candy? Oil pastel or watercolor? Film photography or digital?
4) Winter, definitely, I'm an Autumn/Winter person. Strawberry milk, always! Hmm, as much as I LOVE my jellies, I'm going to have to go with Doc Martens. Chocolate! I'd have to pick watercolours. I do a lot of film photography & I definitely prefer that to digital
Artsy things
What sort of art mediums do you usually focus on in your works?
1) I am in love with brusho inks, which is what I usually use on my drawings and paintings, with a hint of watercolours & often acrylics. It usually depends on what I am painting, I suppose & when I am feeling quite patient, I dabble with oil paints too, so there isn't really a particular medium that I usually focus on, I like to experiment with different materials and see what I end up with. What inspires you when you are working artistically?
2) Everything in one way or another inspires me. I know this a rather vague answer, but honestly, I cannot simply name a few things, as everything I see, touch, hear, smell always influence my art. When I'm having an artist block, I get ridiculously frustrated, so I turn to my old friends; books; the lives of fictional characters, galleries & films. I talk to people I wouldn't normally talk to, I visit places I normally wouldn't be able to & sometimes, I just stand, whether it's in a middle of a crowd, in a shopping center, on someone's doorstep or beneath a tree.
Are there any recurring themes or ideas in your art which you explore? 3) Most of my work has been inspired by my favourite fictional characters and other art has been based on personal experiences, daily life changes & struggles.
Were you always interested in art? 4) Yes, always. I used to draw & paint on everything when I got my first paint pallet at the age of four, unfortunately, my mother was not impressed with me painting on every wall in the house, as I preferred them to a piece of paper. I loved it, everything about it. I am slightly oblivious with a lot of things when it comes to art & there's a lot that still needs to be learnt. After all these years, I can truly say that art has kept me sane. Do you have a piece/series of your art which you are most proud of? 5) Not really, no. As an artist, I want to do as much as I can & regardless of how much I do, it's never good enough, for me anyway & it's not because I like being harsh on myself, it's because it pushes me to do even more & helps me step out of my comfort zone. There are pieces of photography that I have done, which I have liked, but that is all. Perhaps when I create something that I'm truly proud of & 100% happy with, I shall let you know then.
Do you pre-plan your art a lot or is it based mostly on impulses? 6)I don't often plan my work, no. I'm one of those people who like capturing what they see & wishing they had cameras for eyes. I experiment a lot & that is how I like it anyway, there is no fun in planning & preparing a piece, but there is fun in finding something unexpected & extraordinary as you go a long the way of creating something completely out of the blue. I love this playlist you made HEAPS and the art at the top just made me go woahhh and I was wondering how you made it, I mean materials and techniques wise 7) Aww, I'm really happy that you liked it, it features some of my favourite songs! I did a bit of collaging for its art, where I used a small old map (which almost resembles a brain) so I thought it would hit perfectly well with the theme of utopia & being a part of the perfect imagined world. For the figure, I simply used a felt tip pen & then layered the entire collage onto the photo, which inverted its colours, making it look quite dreamy, but slightly melancholic
This is the collage I'm talking about
She is the coolest cat and such a lovely and nice and beautiful person and such a talented babe. This is only some of her super wonderblime, fabaroonie, beautiful, amazing, afhbwlfb art and y'all should check out her tumblr and be amazed by her stuff
Truly Mary,
P.s The song for this letter is Beach Rats by the growlers, I got really anxious in an English SAC a few days ago and didn't write anything cos my hands were shaking and I may have failed but afterwards I listened to this song and I just felt so calm and relaxed (sorry if this sounds stupid or something)
Urghhh I don't know how to start this letter to you,
beginnings are always the hardest thing. Sometimes I try
to personify school, when I write angsty poems on the train at the end of term, but if I actually think really hard
about the sort of person school would be I'm not all that sure. Maybe a family
friend, the nice yet notoriously gossipy type you see all the time and don't
have much in common with but still don't mind. I don't know, I mean sometimes I
genuinely enjoy school and learning but it can also feel overwhelming and
anxiety inducing. All the superficial socialising and the false fronts really
wear me down and disgust me after a
while but I guess I'm part of it too, and perhaps that makes it worse. But I
don't hate school, despite my melodramatic declarations otherwise, it just
seems like a soupy experience, all the good and bad things mushed together like
undercooked carrots and noodles. Anyways what am I even saying? And why am I
comparing my school experiences to raw carrots? Hmm at any rate what I really
wanted to talk to you about was HAIR. I
spent most of my classes today having in depth discussions with friends over
dying hair, toner, hair inspiration, bleach etc. All I really want is to have
fantastic aqua/teal/purple/pine green/any awesome colour hair so in honour of
my desperation I have attached several photos of hair I deeply admire.
Oh also just
sayin all images are sourced from tumblr. I couldn't track the original sources
of the images because I saved them onto my laptop ages ago into a folder titled
"Hairrrrrrr" but if anyone
sees a photo of theirs which I have used and would like me to acknowledge
them/take it down just let moi know.
yeye for Enid Coleslaw
Truly Mary,
Ps. I'm going to see art by Kate Price this weekend! Yayyyy
Pps. I really need to go op/thrift shopping. It has reached a level of physical longing-y type pain, I haven't been in weeks and I really just need to go and buy some lacy granny shirts and plaid miniskirts and urghhh I just wanna get pretty and cheap clothes
Dear Shakespeare, A few days ago I was called a “sarcastic
bitch” for voicing my views on feminism. On a pro feminist rant. The guy who
called me this ironically wrote the rant, and continued on with a tirade of
insults where he told me to “go the fuck away”. You know what the sickest part
is? Instead of snapping my fingers in a ‘z’ formation and giving him some Beyoncé
style sass as to why it is NOT ok to refer to me as a bitch I started to get
anxious. When I get anxious my stomach starts to hurt, I cry and cliché as it
sounds I feel as fragile as thin poorly made glass. Do you know why I felt
anxious? Because I worried that maybe he was right, maybe I was too sarcastic
or maybe I had said everything wrong in an inarticulate mess and it actually
could have been seen as offensive. You might feel disgusted at me now. How
pathetic/submissive/urghh is she? In retrospect I realise how a sad and
dangerous those thoughts were. Mostly because they represent a larger problem I
see in myself…
[Cue
angsty, feelings-y paragraph where I talk about emotions, eww]
The problem I am referring to is that my
emotions seem to be greatly affected by the reactions and comments of those
around me. How problematic is this? It means that how I feel is left to the mercy
of those judging me. And people can be mean. Where is my ownership over myself?
My opinions on me should matter the most because I am
the one who lives with myself every day, who drags my tired body out of bed
when it’s still dark outside to get ready for another day at school. Other
people will forget me over time but I can’t forget myself. I don’t know why
I care so much about what people say or think about me, it’s terrible and
leaves my self-confidence scarily low. Is everyone like this? Sometimes people tell me to “stop
caring” as if it’s the easiest thing in the world and the only reason why
I haven’t done so is due to reluctance. When someone says that it fucking
annoys me. If adopting a “don’t give a damn” attitude was as easy as
dressing like Bender in the Breakfast Club I would have already done so, down
to his little gold hoop earring.
[end feelings-y
paragraph]
I have more to say but
I’ve confused myself, I just needed a mini rant on this topic, maybe soon I’ll
write a proper and structured letter to you detailing my worries on the
external dependency of my emotions. Until then, URGHHH
Truly Mary,
Ps. I am in HAIR HELL at the moment, a hairdresser cut me a front fringe without me asking and then charged me extra! My hair is super curly so it never stays proper and it makes me cry because I love fringes but it looks absolutely terrible on me :(
Pps. I was going to make the song for this letter No intention by Dirty Projectors but I think we need some Beyonce girl love
I'm on the hunt for the perfect tutu, it ought to make
me feel like a fairy princess and extend to my ankles in a series of multi-coloured pastel tulle layers. Sadly I have no clue where to buy
one, currently it only exists in my dreams where I am dressed like the human embodiment of a sprinkly pink donut, I've tried scouring the children's section of opshops, etsy, ebay urghhh all to
no avail! Do you know where I could get one Shakespeare?
I start school tomorrow and I don't want to go back,
last term was exhausting and stressful and I know every school term could be
described by any of those words but the last one was just urghhh! I felt tired
every day, could barely handle all the socialising and work and I just felt so
overwhelmed and sad and terribly angsty. It felt like something out of a cliché
American girly teen movie and I hated that because I guess I thought it made me
superficial and shallow and a stereotype.
The holidays were both long and short, I guess they
feel short now that they're almost over. I had this massive list of things I
wanted to do over the break and I tried but I feel that most of my time was
spent in daggy yet comfortable pyjamas on the internet watching The Royal
Tenenbaums or blasting Come on Eileen
whilst jumping around in a series of mad movements I call dancing. I suppose my list was idealistic but I'll
leave it up to you to decide… anyhow here it is:
·Work on zine
with the lovely Tessa
·Pretend to be a
princess living in a candy pastel world
·Go opshopping
·Buy kitschy
room deco
·Make a theme
journal and a journal of interesting information
·Make a
marshmallow and ice cream soup
·Take a
dressmaking class
·Shoot some
photo-sets
·Read lotssss
·Spend time
people/life watching
·Write poetry
·Read philosophy
concerned with existentialism
·Go see art by
Kate Price
I planned it all out and it gave me the illusion of
structure but it didn't really work out all that neatly; I shot a mini photo
set with a friend which I'm waiting to get developed, went op-shopping and realised I have terrible grandma-y taste
in clothes but absolutely love it and I did some of the other things in small
ways. However I didn't finish my small heap of holiday homework meaning I am
doomed (said in a ghost voice and pronounced doooooooomed), instead I lazed
around and I tried using photoshop for the first time to create a collage
This is how it turned out, what do you think? It's Tim Burton imagining different landscapes and just to clarify they are totally moths and not butterflies coming out of his head. I have lots more to talk about with you photo set ideas, zine ideas, style influences, interesting word lists urghh but I have an 1,000 word essay due tomorrow which I haven't finished and I'm over writing because all my paragraphs are 350 words when they should be 250 but it's all just utter bullshit
Truly Mary,
P.s the song for this letter is my holiday song and a song I sincerely believe they should have played at my school formal to make everything perfect and amazing. I love it soo much!
